The Fallacy of North America

It seems like ages since I left Russia but I'm really only coming to the end of my third week back in Canada. In 3 short weeks I've got a car, a job, a bank account and begun looking for a place to live (34 and staying with my mother may be alright in Russia but is so not cool in Canada).

Despite all this hectic activity, I haven't had time to really adjust to life in the Maritimes. I still feel stuck somewhere between here and there, and the reverse culture shock is unsettling. I've gone through periods of "I love it here!" to "I want to go back to Russia!" I definitely miss some things about Russia, namely, the chaotic freedom, the architectural aesthetics (of Moscow, at least), the beauty of the people (mainly the women) and the feeling of doing something wonderful with my life.

Here in Halifax I feel only the crunch of time and finance. I have a full-time job and it pays better than my English Teacher's salary but it doesn't offer the kind of financial freedom that living rent-free did in Moscow. My schedule is also heavily regulated by work, and I can't be late or negotiate or enjoy long breaks throughout the day.

One thing that really bugs me about life back home is the complete ignorance of the Canadian people to life outside their own little bubble. I can't relate at all with anybody, and when they begin in-depth conversations about what was on TV last night or how much interest they're paying on their mortgage or their car financing, I switch off. How could I ever possibly explain to them the wonders of Moscow, the history of St. Petersburg, the vastness of the steppes, the feeling of standing on Mamaev Kurgan? How could they even care about the wonders of the Moscow Metro or the absolutely mesmerizing femininity of Russian women or the chaos of gypsy taxis? The fact is, they can't.

I found Russians to be much more engaging in conversation, and much more intelligent about the world around them, then Canadians. Russians were always polite and interested in different places, whereas Canadians have that irritating North American smugness. I also find Canadians incredibly dishonest and feel like everyone is out to rip me off. In Russia, I KNEW everyone was out to rip me off but those I counted as friends I could trust 100%.

In many ways Russia is superior to Canada. Canada's infrastructure is stable, the air is clean, the society well-organized, democracy and the rule of law is healthy and the economy is sound, but the culture really sucks. The exact opposite is true for Russia.

This is mainly the effect of reverse culture-shock, and with time and patience I'll become numb to the glaring hypocrasies I see around me, and eventually I'll become another ignorant dumb-ass Canadian. I do love living in Nova Scotia, however, and ultimately this province is superior in many ways to snooty British Columbia (and the beaches here are better). For me, however, there is no difference right now between people from the Maritimes and people from the west coast, or people from Florida or Wisconsin for that matter. That North American attitude is really grinding on me, and I miss the deep cultural wonder and beauty of Russia and Europe.

British Columbia

Once a person spends a bit of time in the west coast Canadian province of British Columbia (called "BC" by locals for ease sake), something strange and remarkable comes over them that stays with them for the rest of their lives. It becomes impossible for them to dream of living anywhere else. Their dreams become filled with visions of mountains, beaches, rainforests and beautiful people. They are, in short, captivated.

British Columbia is home to nearly 5 million people, with half of them, 2.5 million, living in the paradise city of Vancouver. The province has 940,000 square km of land, from the Alaskan and Yukon borders in the north to the border with Washington state in the south. and yet nearly 52% of the land is uninhabited, making BC one of the least-densely populated areas in the world. The United Nations determined that for every person living in BC, there is 520 square metres of land!

While Canada has consistently maintained one of the highest standards of living in the world for the past four decades as determined by the United Nation's Human Development Index (switching places every year with Australia and Denmark for the top 3 countries), British Columbia is consistently ranked as having the highest standards of living within Canada. Vancouver has been awarded Best City in the World 8 years in a row by a variety of sources: the UN, Forbes, the US Organization of Mayors, and National Geographic. Vancouver is rated as having the best infrastructure, lowest crime rates, best schools, best air quality, best health care, highest employment rates, stable housing markets, etc etc of all the cities in the world. All this despite a global economic crisis (which left Canada, and BC in particular, fairly untouched due to vast natural resources, a smart banking sector, prudent government planning and a touch of good luck).

Vancouver, of course, takes all the credit for BC's wonders, but there are so many more to behold. Drive north of Vancouver for a couple of hours and you'll find yourself in the Okanogan Valley, a huge valley between two mountain ranges with excellent black earth. This has been developed into a vast agricultural area and the third largest wine-making area in North America. Drive north for 12 hours and you find yourself in Prince Rupert, a bustling little city with the feel of an old gold-rush-era frontier town. A bit further north from there and you find yourself in Alaska. Along the way you'll pass through the Sunshine Coast area, along the Pacific Ocean, with some breathtaking geography and a well-groomed highway.

Off the coast lies a series of islands, the biggest and most populated of which is Vancouver Island. This island is a little bigger than Denmark. The city of Victoria is on the sourthern tip, jutting into American waters and only a 40 minute catameran ride from Seattle. Victoria is one of the most beautiful cities I've ever seen. It's population, 400,000, is mostly engaged in IT, finance and government work (Victoria is the provincial capital of BC), but a little known secret about Victoria is that it is sub-tropical and the only place in Canada where palm trees grow naturally!

Drive north of Victoria along the west coast of the island for 2 hours and you reach Tofino and Ucluelet (called "Ukee" by locals), the western-most points in North America where the Pacific crashes onto breathtaking cliffs and people swim and surf off long, sandy beaches. Several resorts offer "storm watching" packages in the winter. Sit in a comfortable room with a fireplace and giant wrap-around windows overlooking the cliffs of Tofino and watch as massive waves batter the rocky shore.

The people of BC are incredibly friendly. One time in Vancouver my ex and I were sitting in a bar where a live band was playing 90's alternative covers, and we were talking about how it is hard to find people to hang out with in big cities. Just as we finished saying this, a pretty blonde girl sitting at the table next to us leaned over and said, with a big smile on her face, "Hello! What's your name?" It is very easy to make friends in BC because people are very laid back. Time moves a bit slower in BC.

Finally, BC is one of the most dreamy and spiritual places I have ever been. The culture is a blend of US pop, old English, spicy Asian and earthy native. With eagles overhead, mountains and ocean all around, orca, blue and sperm whales nearby and gigantic 1000-year-old trees everywhere, it is impossible not to feel a touch of the divine. This may be why BC is home to both new-age hippy-types and moderately-liberal Christian denomitions. In BC, God is all around.

Here are some videos I've dug up from the internet showcasing British Columbia. If you want to take a vacation or even immigrate anywhere in this world, I highly recommend British Columbia, Canada.

A tourism promotion video for BC.



A video showcasing Vancouver.




A video showcasing the Okanagan wine region.



A video showcasing Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada.

Ballet & Hockey

On Saturday I took Katerina to see the world-famous Moscow Ballet Company perform Tchaikovsky's "Nutcracker Suite". I wanted to be sure to see a ballet in Russia because it's sort of a cultural institution. Russia is famous for ballet!

I had never been to a ballet before Saturday and I wasn't sure if I would like it or not but, as it turns out, I had a great time! Not only was the entire story of the Nutcracker told through dance (none of that retarded modern interpretational dance), but the music was fantastic and I had managed to secure front-row seats which made the show more intimate and allowed me to see up the ballerinas skirts.

Russians have a cultural habit of clapping in unison when a performer has impressed them, rather than in the thunderous outburst of individual applause that most of the rest of the world does. I found this uncomforting and didn't partake in many of the applauses, although silently in my head I was applauding the performances. I need to look into where this comes from. Is it a uniquely Russian way of applauding, is it a leftover from Communist times, or is it one of those instances of Russia borrowing from another culture and making it slightly weird (like their toilets)?

No photography was allowed, so I couldn't take any pictures, but on Sunday I joined Quagmire, Wonderpants and Ms. Australia at a knock-off "Irish" bar in Mytischi called Temble Bar to watch the big gold-medal game in Olympic men's hockey between Canada and the U.S.A.

It was a fantastic game with America tying it up in the last 20 seconds of the third period, and Canada going on to win 3-2 in overtime. I had to work Monday morning but we stayed there until 2 am watching the game.

Katerina became very pissed off at me around 1 am because she also had to work in the morning. I had warned her beforehand that the game would likely go until 1, but apparently she took this to mean that, regardless of the score, we would leave at 1. She was in a huff for the rest of the night.

Nevertheless, despite the pissy girlfriend, the hockey game was fun and I presented Wonderpants and Quagmire with silver medals Katerina and I had made before the game. That was a venue I do have pictures from, and below you can see how this Canadian hockey fan in Moscow helped cheer his team to a gold-medal victory!

The game on TV at Temple Bar Mytischi

My lucky mittens (knitted by my girlfriend) with a Canadian dollar (AKA: loony)

Decked out super-fan in Moscow, Russia.